Intentional Living | Life with Essie B.

The Juggling Act: Releasing the Old, Embracing the New (and the Scale’s Rollercoaster!)

Whew, can we just talk about this journey for a minute? Because let me tell you, it’s been a ride. If you’ve been following along, you know I’m in a full-blown battle for the new me, working tirelessly to build her up while gently, but firmly, releasing the old. And honestly? It’s a whole lot. It feels like I’m juggling flaming torches, chainsaws, and maybe a live badger sometimes. But in the midst of the chaos, there’s so much good happening.

The Scale Saga and Shifting Mindset

Let’s address the elephant in the room, or rather, the numbers on the scale. Goodness, this thing has been a rollercoaster. One minute I’m celebrating a loss, the next it’s creeping back up. It’s frustrating, right? You put in the work, you make the choices, and then your body decides to hold onto those last few pounds like it’s guarding national treasure. My emotions are all over the place – there’s disappointment, for sure, because who doesn’t want instant gratification? I’m impatient, I want to see those results now.

But here’s the kicker: beneath that impatience is a deep, unwavering commitment. I’m learning to be realistic, to understand that my body’s going to do its thing, especially when it comes to significant changes. This isn’t a quick fix; it’s a profound transformation, and that takes time. The bigger picture? I am making real, tangible progress on weight loss. So far, I’ve officially lost 25 pounds on this journey, and let me tell you, it’s finally starting to show! Clothes are fitting differently, I’m feeling lighter, and that’s an incredible feeling.

Building the New Me: Routines, Systems, and Small Victories

This “new me” isn’t just happening by magic. It’s a deliberate, conscious effort to implement routines and systems that support my goals. And while it’s a lot to keep track of, I’m choosing these changes for myself, knowing they’ll lead to a healthier, happier life.

So, what’s been working? My daily routine now includes drinking collagen, Miralax, and fiber – getting that digestive system happy! I’m committed to getting in a walk at least three out of five workdays a week, and hitting at least 40 ounces of water during my workday. And my Apple Watch rings? I’m aiming to close those five out of seven days a week, pushing myself to move more.

Beyond that, I’m focusing on my overall health. Hydrating my skin, taking Geritol multivitamins for iron and other needs, and adding liquid Vitamin D3/K2 (especially crucial for us melanated folks!) are non-negotiables. And speaking of moving, I invested in two new pairs of Brooks shoes to support my wide feet, and wow, what a difference they’ve made! I’m walking further and more comfortably than ever before.

Even my sleep is getting an upgrade! I recently got a new CPAP machine, and while it’s a learning curve, using it seven times in the last three weeks has already made my days feel so much better. The energy boost is real.

Tools of the Trade: My Support System

I couldn’t do this without my little army of apps and tools. My Stelo biosensor has been a game-changer, giving me real-time insights into my glucose levels and helping me understand my body’s responses to food. It’s truly amazing what you can track these days!

I’m also leaning on Shotsy (for tracking those weekly injections, which, by the way, have been smooth sailing!), Happy Scale for a more forgiving view of the numbers, and the Renpho weight scale. My Apple Health app is like the central hub, sending all that vital information to my other apps and keeping everything in one place.

But perhaps the biggest change is the shift in my eating habits. I’m more mindful, more conscious of what I’m putting into my body. Now, when I crave Chipotle, I’m ordering a kid’s meal. Instead of a full hibachi plate and sushi, I’m choosing just sushi. And that mini sub or sub-in-a-bowl from Jersey Mike’s? Those are my new go-tos. These aren’t just small swaps; they’re monumental shifts in how I approach food.

Looking Forward: Birthday Reflections and New Horizons

As my upcoming birthday approaches, it brings with it a wave of appreciation for life, but also a stark reminder: tomorrow isn’t promised. There’s so much more I want to do, so many experiences to have, and this journey is about creating the best possible version of myself to live it all.

Speaking of new horizons, I’m excited to share that I’m also working on a video update! I’m hoping to have that done by the end of May, just in time for my birthday month. It’ll be another way to share this evolving story with you all.

This fight for the new me isn’t always pretty, and it’s definitely not linear, but I am here for it. Every step, every choice, every small victory is moving me closer to the woman I’m becoming. And that, my friends, is worth all the juggling in the world.

Ready to Embrace Your Own “New You”?

What aspect of building your “new self” resonates most with you right now? Share your own journey in the comments below – I’d love to hear how you’re navigating your own transformation!

Almost There! Celebrating Progress, Jamaica Reset, and Spring Break Plans

Posted on April 22 by EssieB

Stepping into Spring with Milestones, Jamaica Vibes, and Birthday Cheers!

Hey everyone! Things have been feeling particularly vibrant lately, and I wanted to share a little life update from my corner of the DMV. Spring is officially here, bringing with it a sense of renewal and a few exciting milestones on the horizon!

First off, I’m absolutely thrilled to share that I’m so incredibly close to hitting my first significant weight loss goal! It’s been a journey of intentional effort, as well as getting my health together in many, and seeing the progress has been incredibly motivating. I am not ashamed to say I am using a medication to help in my weight loss and it has been so instrumental in my progress so far. The recent increase in my Zepbound or compound tirzepatide (depending on when I take it) dosage seems to be settling in well, and I’m feeling really good overall. This whole process has really kickstarted a deeper commitment to my health, and I’ve become a bit of a data geek, diligently tracking all sorts of metrics on my phone through various apps. It’s empowering to see the numbers reflect the positive changes I’m making.

Speaking of feeling good, I recently had the immense pleasure of escaping for a second international trip in my life, taken this year – a much-needed reset in beautiful Jamaica. The sunshine, the vibrant culture, and the sheer relaxation were exactly what I needed to recharge my batteries. It’s amazing what a little time away can do for the mind and spirit, and I’m feeling refreshed and ready to tackle what’s next.

And what’s next? Well, for all my fellow DCPS parents out there, you know spring break is just around the corner! While my work schedule means I won’t be taking a full week off, I’m definitely carving out some precious time to spend with my youngest boys. We’re planning a fun day (or at least a glorious half-day) exploring some of the many kid-friendly gems right here in the DC area. Stay tuned for potential adventures!

On a slightly less glamorous but equally important note, my quest for new walking shoes continues! I’ve been putting it off (oops!), but my knees are definitely reminding me that it’s time. My loyalty lies firmly with Brooks – as a plus-sized woman with, shall we say, substantial legs and thighs, the stability and support they offer are non-negotiable for keeping my knees happy. While I sometimes wish they came in a wider array of colors, function absolutely trumps fashion when it comes to comfortable and supportive footwear. If any of you have favorite Brooks models for stability, especially for us curvier folks, I’m all ears for recommendations!

In other exciting news, I’ve been diving headfirst into the fascinating world of AI prompt generation for imaging. It’s like unlocking a whole new level of creative expression, and I’m really enjoying honing this skill. Who knows, maybe you’ll start seeing some of my AI-generated artwork popping up here on the blog in the future!

Finally, and this is a big one – by the time this post goes live, we will have officially celebrated a major milestone in our family! My oldest son will have turned 19 years old on April 22nd! It feels like just yesterday I was navigating those early years of motherhood here in the DMV, and now he’s on the cusp of adulthood. It’s a bittersweet but incredibly proud moment for me. Happy early (or belated, depending on when you’re reading this!), birthday to my amazing young man!

My son’s room decorated, courtesy of his girl bf

Life here in my corner of DC is a beautiful blend of progress, relaxation, family, and new discoveries. Thanks for being a part of the journey with me. What are you looking forward to this spring? Let me know in the comments below!

Warmly,

To Future Me at 50: A Decade of Purpose, Lessons, and Resilience

Posted on April 13, 2025 by EssieB

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

To my future self, the woman who has reached the milestone of 50 in (what will be) 2035:

As I sit here in the spring of 2025, 40-year-old navigating the beautiful chaos of life in Southeast DC and DC in general; juggling motherhood to three incredible young men in training; the pursuit of my education with dreams of law school, and the ever-present hum of neurodiversity, I look ahead to you with a sense of hopeful anticipation.

I see us, future me, walking even more deeply into our purpose. The seeds of that purpose, nurtured through late nights studying after the kids are asleep, fueled by a desire for justice and understanding cultivated in my liberal arts journey, will have blossomed. Perhaps you are indeed an attorney, advocating for others with the tenacity I know you possess. Or maybe your path has taken an unexpected, yet equally fulfilling turn, still guided by that inner compass pointing towards meaningful contribution. Your past experience as a small business owner/notary public – a testament to your responsibility and attention to detail – will have undoubtedly informed your professional journey in valuable ways.

I see us leaning even more profoundly into the hard-won lessons of our 20s and 30s. Those years of navigating divorce, raising my children, and the constant balancing act of personal aspirations and familial responsibilities will have forged an inner strength and wisdom that guides your decisions. Even these current 40s, with their own unique set of challenges – perhaps the ongoing management of my ADHD and other conditions, the evolving dynamics of raising teenagers, and the personal weight loss journey – hold lessons yet to be fully understood. But I have faith that you, future me, will have met those challenges head-on, learned from them, and owned those lessons with the same resilience that has carried us this far.

This next decade, the one leading to you, feels pregnant with possibility. I envision significant accomplishments – perhaps academic milestones achieved, professional goals realized, and personal growth that continues to surprise and delight us. The drive that led me back to school, the ambition to pursue a challenging career change, the unwavering love for our sons – these forces will propel us forward.

And through it all, the underlying truth remains: no matter what joys or hardships this next decade brings, good or bad, we will survive it, the Lord willing. We are survivors. We are mothers. We are learners. We are resilient. The spirit that allowed me to navigate the complexities of life in my 30s, that fuels my current endeavors, will undoubtedly continue to sustain us. You, future me at 50, are a testament to that enduring strength.

I look forward to meeting you in the years to come, eager to witness the woman we have become.

With love and anticipation,

Me (at 41)