What the red, white and blue mean to me

Are you patriotic? What does being patriotic mean to you?

I am an American but I’m a Black American. And yes, there’s a difference-whether we like to admit it or say the quiet part out loud. In that description or statement is packed legacy, love, soul, history, and culture. At that same point, it’s also packed in pain, fear, constant criticism and oppression. So many people say they want to hear less of the last part or any difference in what an American is. I wish that were true and I could relax and just say I am American but when I am perceived visually before I am experienced, that is all I know.

I celebrated the fourth of July just like any American when I was younger. I didn’t really stop and think about it until I hit my late 20s/early 30s. After the reality of how society views me came into knowledge for myself, I chose to celebrate Juneteenth as my Independence Day. That evolved to include Emancipation Day (DC’s version of Juneteenth) and I hadn’t looked back for many years. In 2026, I have had an epiphany of sorts that I can once again celebrate all three holidays and make it what I want for ME. That means having the Afro American colors of black, red, green, and gold as well as the red, white and blue. That means finding a shirt that has all that on it or getting the American flag in the Afro American colors. It’s remembering my ancestors and what they bled, fought, and survived for during July 1776 or April 1862 or June 1865.

I am my ancestors’ answered prayers and I choose to allow that to be what my compass for patriotism mean to me.🖤❤️💚💛❤️🤍💙

EssieB in stxingkai font

Random thought and video of my progress-2025 vs 2026 Me

Been on this #weightlossjourney here in #DC and so far have released over 65lbs. Peppers used as a tool along with changing my diet, listening to my body and moving it have all gotten me here. It first started in my mind and from there, it was over for the fat! Do I have more work to do? Yep! Have I come far though? Sure have! I can’t wait to see where I end this journey and go to maintenance🥹

EssieB in stxingkai font

I Didn’t Believe But Now I Do: My Peptide Origin Arc

I started my journey into peptides aka “peppers” in March 2025, March 1st to be exact. It was after a conversation with my eldest sister at Christmas about her starting her journey on Ozempic aka “Ozzy”. She said her doctor had told her she needed it and how it would help her insulin resistance. I was just listening and open to change at that time. Even though I was taking my thyroid meds as directed, I was still floundering and in pain.

I was against any weight loss meds initially. When the commercials came out, it didn’t help me see the medicines as a choice. Also, all the media references and negative spins on who was on it and who wasn’t were in my mind too. Add to that I had tried losing weight naturally by diet and walking as I had done in my younger years, way before my hormones/organ betrayed me. Then, hearing of “Ozempic” face as a constant thing on blogs and in the news; it definitely molded and shaped my objective stance. But once I started talking to my big sis and heard her thoughts, it opened my mind to do more research.

My research led to me talking to my endo; who previously had recommended weight loss drugs and was happy to do a recommendation for it through insurance at that time. By this appointment though, when I was comfortable asking for the medicine, insurance wasn’t approving anyone for coverage and co-pays🙃. That led to me having to find a way to self pay and get it myself. After going to the direct source of the meds by way of big pharma/ patent holder company, I was able to find out I could pay out of my own pockets monthly if my doctor ordered it directly through them. Ordering the meds directly was a learning curve for both my doctor and myself but I managed to get on Zepbound but I’m calling it “Jetbound”. 

Let me back up on what I chose and why. I researched “Ozzy” and I also researched “Jetbound”. Ozzy works on one pathway in our body while Jet works on two. “Why choose one way when I can take two” was my line of thinking and so I chose Jet. 

Getting more into the science stuff and remembering my chemistry from 10th grade, it threw me into learning and expanding my medical layman’s knowledge. This helped me to advocate for myself with my primary and my endo. 

Here’s where things shifted:

I was swinging the costs until I just couldn’t. Originally, I had to rob Peter to pay Paul for my monthly starting doses. I am extremely active on Reddit. It’s where I first stumbled across the name brand’s subreddit. From there and after reading a lot on that board, if I remember correctly, I then went to Tirzepatide aka “Trizzy” Compound boards.

After that, I was off to the races!

I made a bunch of silly decisions or mistakes and will detail that another day but I wouldn’t trade the journey for nothing!

When I say I took photos on first dose day as well as my weight, I was shocked and surprised by what I looked like and weighed. [Insert pics of that day & my starting weight].

It was the heaviest I have ever measured myself and I was struggling. I actually lost a few pounds right before but it just wasn’t enough. Not to mention I was inflamed, bloated and in all types of aching pain. My thyroid was fighting me and it was winning. Or, rather my body was fighting with itself and it was not a lovely feeling. After taking the first shot, it might have been a placebo effect but my joints in my hands felt so much better. I could open and close them without my hands locking up. It had gotten to the point where I couldn’t braid or twist my hair any longer. Also, my arms had on and off feelings of pins and needles, most of the time. I was only 40! Not to mention my insulin resistance and how prediabetes was affecting my whole body. From my eyesight being the worst it has ever been in my life due to sugar. Add to that mysterious bruises appearing on my body, and my cuts not healing as quick as they used to. I was just ready for change and this did it. 

Has this ride been smooth sailing? Heck nope! I started March 1st and went on a girls trip in mid-April. Guess who learned the hardest way alcohol won’t mix with these meds? This girlie🙋🏾‍♀️. Had a day or so in my room enjoying the porcelain throne a lot more than I should have been in Jamaica. 🙃🤪

I have had plenty more slip ups or learning lessons but won’t give them all away in one post because then, what else would you tune back in for? 😏😉

So stay tuned, because I have so much more to say and share about my journey so far. Especially for folks who look like me🫶🏾. I am ready to share and know I’m not the only woman, momma who wants to feel better but may not know where to turn. 

This is now. 60lbs down🎉🎉🎉
Almost a year on this journey!🥳🎉🔥

I’ve sustained my Temple. Are you ready to sustain yours?

EssieB in stxingkai font

Love Essie B in DC