Becoming who I want to be. Who I needed to be. My best self. My only competition is myself. Staying in MY lane and documenting it as I go along. Join me.
Bear with me, as this rant unloads. Early morning thoughts were put in writing.
I believe that taking ownership of my life has been a major game changer. It has significantly impacted the current direction and decisions I have been making. I am not a passenger in this ride called life. I am the captain of this ship called ME. Life isn’t just happening to me. It’s happening for me. I only concentrate and focus on the things that I can control, and that is myself. I can’t lie. The messy stuff and drama sometimes still gets to me. Sometimes, folks bring me into their messes. For the most part, I ignore it. This has improved both my mental health and stress levels enormously. I have also learned to try to keep a balance in my life as well. Everything in life needs balance to it. Can’t swing the pendulum too far to the left or too far to the right. There is a need for equilibrium in all things. As humans, we tend by nature to do that.
Another thing we do, as humans, is categorizing everything. If it doesn’t fit into our neat little boxes, we spit out an error message of “we can’t compute”. A lot of people these days walk around with CPUs aka “brains” fried. It’s amazing how we as humans work. I also realize that some of us are spiritual beings having a human experience. Some of us are human beings with a spirit. A small group of us are just humans. That’s a whole ‘nother conversation for another time or day.
Lastly, I realize we all have free will in life, and so I can’t control anything or anyone. I can influence, intimidate or motivate, but actually make someone do something is a no. That includes kids as well. There are some gangsta kids out here. They are willing to take the smoke for what it is they’re about to do. And then there are the ones who play it safe all the time, like I did mostly. Didn’t get me anywhere different, so what the what.
That’s all for my morning rants and random thoughts. 🤷🏾‍♀️
Hey everyone! If you’ve stumbled upon this little corner of the internet, welcome! I’m EssieB, and I’m so excited to finally be embarking on this blogging journey with you all through “LifeWithEssieB.” For those who don’t know me yet, I’m a proud 3rd generation native of Washington, D.C., a city that’s as much a part of my identity as the air I breathe.
While my roots are firmly planted in the vibrant soil of the District, a significant chapter of my childhood unfolded just across the border in Southern Prince George’s County, right on that familiar DC line. Growing up there was like having the best of both worlds – the close-knit community feel of the county, with the ever-present pulse and energy of the nation’s capital just a stone’s throw away. Those early years shaped my perspective in countless ways, offering a unique lens through which I’ve always viewed the DMV and its wonderful, sometimes quirky, blend of cultures and experiences.
Fast-forward a few years (okay, maybe a few more than a few!), and my life is now wonderfully full, primarily thanks to the three incredible young men I’m raising right here in Southeast DC. Being a mom to boys in the city is an adventure in itself, a constant balancing act of school events, weekend explorations, and navigating the unique rhythm of urban family life. Like many of you, I also navigate the world of co-parenting, a journey that has taught me so much about communication, compromise, and putting my children first. My family is my heart, and you’ll definitely be hearing stories and insights about our life here in the District.
Beyond the joys and occasional chaos of motherhood, I also navigate the dynamic world of DC real estate. Helping folks find their little piece of this amazing city, especially guiding first-time buyers through what can often feel like a daunting process, is a real passion of mine. There’s something truly special about helping someone find their home in the place I’ve always called mine.
So, why “LifeWithEssieB”? Well, for years, I’ve felt a pull to share my experiences and perspectives. As a Black woman who’s lived and worked in DC my entire life, I feel there’s a unique story to tell – one that goes beyond the political headlines and stereotypical portrayals. I want to share the everyday realities, the triumphs, and the challenges of navigating life in this incredible city through my own lens.
This blog is also a space for my personal journey of growth. For those who know me, you know I’m always striving to be a better version of myself. That includes my ongoing weight loss journey, a path filled with ups and downs, motivation and moments of struggle, but ultimately one of progress and self-discovery. More recently, I’ve also come to understand myself better through a late diagnosis of ADHD. This revelation has been a significant turning point, offering clarity and new strategies for navigating daily life, from managing tasks to focusing on my online studies as I pursue my aspirations in law. I’ll be sharing some of my experiences and what I’m learning along the way, hoping it might resonate with others on similar paths.
So, what can you expect from “LifeWithEssieB”? Think of this as your go-to space for a real, honest, and often humorous look at:
DC Life: From local hidden gems in SE DC to navigating the city with kids, exploring cultural events, and understanding the unique pulse of our nation’s capital from a native’s perspective.
Motherhood: The joys, the challenges, the messy realities, and the heartwarming moments of raising boys in an urban environment, as well as my experiences with co-parenting.
Real Estate: Insider tips and advice on buying and selling homes in the DC market, neighborhood spotlights (with a special focus on SE DC), and demystifying the process for first-time buyers.
Personal Growth: My ongoing journey with weight loss, navigating life with ADHD, self-care strategies that actually work, and reflections on personal development.
My Perspective as a Black Woman in DC: Sharing my experiences, celebrating the richness of our culture, and offering my thoughts on the world around me.
Ultimately, I hope “LifeWithEssieB” becomes a community – a place where we can connect, share our experiences, learn from each other, and maybe even have a few laughs along the way. I’m excited to embark on this journey and share my life, my city, and my experiences with you all.
What are you most curious to hear about first? Let me know in the comments below! I’m looking forward to connecting with you.
To my future self, the woman who has reached the milestone of 50 in (what will be) 2035:
As I sit here in the spring of 2025, 40-year-old navigating the beautiful chaos of life in Southeast DC and DC in general; juggling motherhood to three incredible young men in training; the pursuit of my education with dreams of law school, and the ever-present hum of neurodiversity, I look ahead to you with a sense of hopeful anticipation.
I see us, future me, walking even more deeply into our purpose. The seeds of that purpose, nurtured through late nights studying after the kids are asleep, fueled by a desire for justice and understanding cultivated in my liberal arts journey, will have blossomed. Perhaps you are indeed an attorney, advocating for others with the tenacity I know you possess. Or maybe your path has taken an unexpected, yet equally fulfilling turn, still guided by that inner compass pointing towards meaningful contribution. Your past experience as a small business owner/notary public – a testament to your responsibility and attention to detail – will have undoubtedly informed your professional journey in valuable ways.
I see us leaning even more profoundly into the hard-won lessons of our 20s and 30s. Those years of navigating divorce, raising my children, and the constant balancing act of personal aspirations and familial responsibilities will have forged an inner strength and wisdom that guides your decisions. Even these current 40s, with their own unique set of challenges – perhaps the ongoing management of my ADHD and other conditions, the evolving dynamics of raising teenagers, and the personal weight loss journey – hold lessons yet to be fully understood. But I have faith that you, future me, will have met those challenges head-on, learned from them, and owned those lessons with the same resilience that has carried us this far.
This next decade, the one leading to you, feels pregnant with possibility. I envision significant accomplishments – perhaps academic milestones achieved, professional goals realized, and personal growth that continues to surprise and delight us. The drive that led me back to school, the ambition to pursue a challenging career change, the unwavering love for our sons – these forces will propel us forward.
And through it all, the underlying truth remains: no matter what joys or hardships this next decade brings, good or bad, we will survive it, the Lord willing. We are survivors. We are mothers. We are learners. We are resilient. The spirit that allowed me to navigate the complexities of life in my 30s, that fuels my current endeavors, will undoubtedly continue to sustain us. You, future me at 50, are a testament to that enduring strength.
I look forward to meeting you in the years to come, eager to witness the woman we have become.
Life with EssieB 